Am I frigid?

 

Dear Bunmi,

Although I am an enlightened 24-year-old secretary, the thought of sex has made me feel sick to my stomach for year

I have to get very drunk and grit my teeth before I allow my boyfriend to have sex with me. Friends have always bragged of how mind-blowing they find sex. Why am I different? Am I frigid? 

Thelma, by e-mail.

Dear Thelma,

For some reasons, you have developed a phobia about sex – a strong physical response you can’t simply overcome by pulling yourself together. Don’t try to get over this on your own. Most importantly, don’t add to the problem by forcing yourself to have sex.

I advise you to see a medical practitioner, who specialises in problems such as yours, who’ll help you break the link between the nausea you feel from the act of sex and, instead, link pleasure-rather than sickness – to love making.

In time, you’ll be able to learn to relax and enjoy sex. Turning to alcohol is certainly not the answer.

s.